Have you ever had one of those moments where you remembered something you said years ago and physically cringed? Like… “Lord, did those words really come out of my mouth?” Please tell me I’m not the only one.
Y’all, I have the worst memory. Seriously. My best friend will start telling a story from a the past, and I’m sitting there wondering if we were even at the same event.
Most of the time, it’s actually a gift. I don’t spend much time replaying old conversations or embarrassing moments because… well… I usually don’t remember them. But every now and then, one sneaks through.
I’ll remember something I said years ago. A careless comment. An ugly attitude. A moment where I wasn’t anything like the woman I want to be. And suddenly my stomach drops.
“Jessica… why would you say that?”
Maybe your memory is better than mine. Maybe yours never lets you forget. That conversation you still replay, a decision you wish you could undo, or a season you wish no one knew about. Shame has a way of pulling those moments back into the present and whispering, “See? That’s who you really are.”
I’ve often wondered if that’s one of the enemy’s oldest tricks. He digs through the pile of who we used to be, holds it up in front of us, and hopes we’ll mistake it for a mirror. He wants us to believe that’s still who we are. But in Christ, it’s not a reflection. It’s a reminder of who Jesus has already redeemed.
This past Easter morning, I was sitting in the prayer room during our church services, reading through Joshua. I wasn’t looking for a blog post. I wasn’t studying Hebrew. I was simply praying and reading truth. Then one word made me stop. Gilgal.
I don’t know why. It just did. I finished reading, went on with my morning, and honestly forgot all about it. Or so I thought.
A few months later, I was sitting at one of Noah’s baseball games. Between innings, I opened Joshua again, and there it was. Gilgal. Again. This time I slowed down.
Joshua 5:9 says, “Today I have rolled away the reproach of Egypt from you. And so the name of that place is called Gilgal to this day.”
Rolled away the reproach.
So naturally… I went dug into what that meant.
The name Gilgal comes from the Hebrew word galal, which means to roll away. Looking back, I can’t help but smile. The first time that word grabbed my attention was Easter morning. At the time, I had no idea why. Looking back now, I think the Lord was simply inviting me to keep digging. Isn’t that just like Him?
Israel had already left Egypt. The Red Sea was behind them. The wilderness was behind them. They had finally made it to the Promised Land. But before they fought a single battle, before the walls of Jericho ever fell, God stopped them. They renewed their covenant. They celebrated Passover. And then God said,
“Today I have rolled away the reproach of Egypt from you.”
God wasn’t going to let them carry Egypt into the Promised Land. Before they marched around Jericho… Before they experienced victory… God dealt with what belonged behind them. I wonder how many of us are asking God to lead us into what’s next while we’re still carrying things He never intended us to bring.
Old failures. Old labels. Old regrets. Old lies we’ve started believing about ourselves. Maybe even old versions of ourselves that Christ has already redeemed.
It’s hard to walk forward when your hands are full of yesterday.
As I sat with Joshua 5, my mind wandered back to Easter. The first time I noticed the word Gilgal had been Resurrection Sunday, and now I understood why it had stayed with me. At Gilgal, God rolled away the reproach of Egypt before His people stepped into the Promised Land. Centuries later, Jesus carried our sin, our guilt, and our reproach to the cross. Then the stone was rolled away.
Because of Jesus, we don’t have to keep carrying what He already carried for us. Not our guilt. Not our condemnation. Not the weight of believing our past gets the final word. When one of those old memories comes rushing back, I don’t pretend it never happened. I simply remember that my past no longer defines me because of what Christ has done.
The more I thought about Gilgal, the more I realized this story isn’t just about Israel. It’s about every one of us who longs to step into what God has prepared but keeps looking over our shoulder. Maybe the question isn’t, “What does God have for me next?” Maybe the better question is, “What is He asking me to leave behind?” Because you can’t carry Egypt into the Promised Land.
That’s one of the reasons I’m so excited about our next Bible study, Created on Purpose.
Soon, we’ll walk through the book of Ephesians together. We’ll talk about purpose, calling, and the good works God has prepared for us. But before we ask, “What has God called me to do?” we’ll begin with a better question:
Who has God already declared me to be because of Christ?
Because it’s hard to walk confidently in your purpose when you’re still carrying what belongs to your past.
If you’ve ever felt like yesterday has a stronger voice than tomorrow, I hope you’ll join us.
One Thing to Remember
It’s hard to walk forward when your hands are full of yesterday.
Before Israel ever marched around Jericho, God stopped them at Gilgal. Before He called them into battle, He reminded them they didn’t belong to Egypt anymore.
I wonder if He’s doing the same for some of us.
Maybe the thing standing between you and your next season isn’t a lack of direction. Maybe it’s something you’ve been carrying that Jesus already carried for you.
Lay it down.
Then walk into what He’s prepared for you.
If this encouraged you today, I’d love to invite you into The Reset Room, a free online community where women gather to grow in God’s Word, encourage one another, and be reminded of His grace in everyday life. If you know someone who could use this reminder today, would you share this post with her? You never know how God might use a simple share to encourage someone who’s been carrying more than they were ever meant to carry.
Until next time… keep seeing life through the lens of His grace.
HER VIEW OF HIS GRACE 
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